9. The Return of the Godforsaken Jeans Dress (Jress)
Just when we thought we were safe, the dreaded jeans dress—or “jress”—has returned to haunt us. Is there no escape from this fashion nightmare? Will we ever be free from this abomination? This particular jress is even worse than most, featuring the ripped and torn aesthetic commonly seen in jeans. It’s overkill, Cardi B. We’re not sure how she’s keeping a straight face while wearing this. Don’t get us wrong—we love her music. It’s just this outfit that’s bothering us. While the idea of upcycling denim into formal wear isn’t inherently bad, this execution falls flat. The distressed elements, while trendy on regular jeans, feel out of place on a dress meant for more formal occasions. It’s as if someone took every denim trend from the past decade and crammed them into one garment. The result is a piece that struggles to define itself—is it casual? Formal? Streetwear? Its design leaves us confused. The fact that even a style icon like Cardi B can’t fully pull it off speaks volumes about its fundamental flaws. Perhaps some fashion experiments—especially those involving combining elements that were never meant to coexist—are better left on the drawing board.
